If you’ve ever been told that you can have good nights or good naps—but not both—you’re not alone. This common myth is often shared by well-meaning parents who have chosen not to sleep train. But the truth? It’s simply not accurate and it's actually harmful because it's keeping many tired families from the rest they need to feel amazing.

Great Night Sleep Leads to Better Naps (And Vice Versa!)

Sleep isn’t an either/or situation. In fact, when your baby gets solid, restorative sleep at night, they are more likely to take better naps during the day. And when naps improve, so does nighttime sleep. It’s a cycle that works for you, not against you.

The problem with accepting the “one or the other” mindset is that it keeps both you and your baby in a state of exhaustion. And let’s be honest—being overtired makes everything harder, from feeding to playtime to your own ability to function throughout the day, never mind enjoying it all.

Why Night Training Comes First

For most families, starting with night training makes the most sense. Nighttime sleep tends to consolidate more quickly, and parents typically see results within just a few days. Once nighttime sleep is solid, nap training becomes much easier because your baby is no longer dealing with chronic overtiredness.

So if you’ve been struggling with broken nights and short, inconsistent naps, know this: you don’t have to live this way. You can have a well-rested baby—and a well-rested you.

Ready to Get the Sleep You Deserve?

If you’re done feeling exhausted and ready to make a change, schedule a free consult today. Together, we can create a sleep plan that works for your family—one that leads to both great nights and restful naps.

If you’ve ever Googled “why is my baby suddenly not sleeping?” at 2 a.m., you’re not alone. You’ve probably heard of the infamous 4-month sleep regression. But what about the others? Sleep regressions commonly occur at 9 months, 12 months, 18 months, and again around 3 years old (or whenever a child transitions from a crib to an open bed).

What is a Sleep Regression?

A sleep regression is a period when a baby or toddler, who was previously sleeping well, suddenly starts waking up frequently, resisting naps, or struggling with bedtime—often out of nowhere. Unlike teething, there’s no obvious physical cause, like pain or illness. (And honestly? Most sleep disruptions blamed on teething aren’t actually caused by erupting teeth.)

Instead, sleep regressions typically happen when a child is experiencing a major developmental leap. At 4 months, babies’ sleep shifts from a newborn pattern (where they can doze off in a noisy room) to a more structured sleep cycle that includes REM sleep. Their increased social awareness means they now have a serious case of FOMO—so you may need to take them to a quiet space to eat and sleep.

Sleep Regressions by Age
 
4-Month Sleep Regression

What’s happening: Babies transition from newborn sleep cycles to more adult-like sleep patterns, waking up more frequently between cycles.

How to handle it: This is a great time to establish strong sleep habits and routines. Teaching independent sleep skills can help them settle between cycles.

9-Month Sleep Regression

What’s happening: Around this time, babies develop separation anxiety, start crawling, and pull up to stand. Many wake up to practice their new skills or check that you’re still nearby.

How to handle it: Give plenty of practice time during the day for new motor skills, provide extra reassurance, and reinforce a consistent bedtime routine.

12-Month Sleep Regression

What’s happening: Taking those first steps and the transition to fewer naps can cause night wakings or nap strikes. Some toddlers also begin testing boundaries.

How to handle it: Stick to a predictable schedule and avoid dropping naps too soon. Encourage soothing techniques that don’t involve rocking or feeding to sleep.

18-Month Sleep Regression

What’s happening: Toddlers develop their own agendas, test boundaries, and experience a surge in independence. Many are also running and jumping.

How to handle it: Stay consistent with bedtime rules, offer extra reassurance, and avoid making big sleep changes during this phase.

Crib-to-Bed Transition Sleep Regression

What’s happening: Moving from the security of a crib to the freedom of a bed can be overwhelming. Toddlers often get out of bed repeatedly, test limits, or struggle with falling asleep without the familiar crib enclosure.

How to handle it: If you haven’t transitioned yet, toddler-proof the room first. Use a doorknob cover to keep them from leaving at will, and never introduce the habit of lying down with them to fall asleep—unless you want a long-term bed partner!

How to Get Through a Sleep Regression

If you haven’t sleep trained yet, now is the perfect time.

Counterintuitively, sleep training actually builds confidence. When a child knows they can fall asleep and stay asleep on their own, they feel secure in the knowledge that you’ll come back when sleep time is done. For babies who rely on an adult to sleep, sleep becomes an anxiety-ridden experience because they have no control over their rest.

If you’ve already sleep trained, the good news is that sleep regressions tend to be shorter and less severe. If your child suddenly starts waking up at night, first check for physical discomfort—illness, temperature issues, or a dirty diaper. If everything checks out, reinforce your existing sleep training method (whether CIO, timed checks, or the chair method).

The key is consistency. Most kids return to great sleep in just 2-3 nights.

PS If your family is stuck in a sleep regression, you’re not alone. I can help. Set up a free consult, and let’s get you unstuck in two weeks or less--guaranteed.

That depends on your preference! There are two main approaches, and each has its pros and cons. Let’s break them down.

Option 1: Potty Training at Age 3+

If you wait until age 3 or later, the process will probably go faster—sometimes as quickly as one day, but more commonly around three days. By this age, children have greater bodily awareness, which makes it easier for them to recognize when they need to go.

If you have a 3-year-old still in diapers, you’ve likely noticed they have a favorite place to poop and may even seek privacy. (In our nanny share, the other child liked to go behind the recliner to poop.) You can take advantage of that by taking your child immediately to the bathroom when you see them head to their favorite pooping spot. 

Pros of Potty Training at 3+ Years:
 
✅ Stronger body awareness makes the process go more quickly
✅ Less cleanup overall 
✅ More independence, more quickly, because a three-year-old may be able to pull down and up their pants themselves. 

Cons of Potty Training at 3+ Years:

❌ More likely to resist potty training if they don’t want to do it (hello, power struggles!) ❌ Refusing to poop on the potty is common at this age and can last for weeks or months
❌ No amount of stickers, M&Ms, or screen time bribes will work if they don't want to cooperate (lack of cooperation is much less common with toddlers) 
❌ You may end up paying for an extra year and a half of diapers
❌ You will be diapering a much larger kid in the meantime, which may have a certain ick factor

Option 2: Potty Training Between 21-28+ Months

This is the approach I’ve chosen for all three of my kids. It takes a bit longer—usually about a week—but it avoids the battles that can come with training a strong-willed 3+-year-old.

Pros of Early Potty Training (21-28 Months):

✅ Toddlers are generally more compliant and eager to please
✅ Less resistance = fewer power struggles
✅ Simple rewards (like clapping) are enough motivation
✅ Significant cost savings on diapers
✅ More environmentally friendly

Cons of Early Potty Training (21-28 Months):

❌ Takes longer than training at age 3+ because body awareness is still developing
❌ Requires patience and a zen approach to cleaning up messes

Common Potty Training Myths & Realities

Some parents believe diapers are easier than dealing with the potty, but I haven’t found that to be true. Yes, it’s inconvenient for about a month—right now, we don’t go far without a potty, and we’ve rolled up our rugs to make cleanup easier. But the long-term benefits are worth it to me, because I dislike the cost and ickiness of changing diapers after the first year of life. Also, I have never (knock wood!) had to deal with potty poop refusal and that can take a lot longer than a week to resolve, months, sometimes. 

Need Help with Potty Training?

If you’re feeling overwhelmed, stuck in a cycle of accidents, or just don’t know where to start, I can help (whether you are potty training early, late, or somewhere in between). Book a free parent coaching consult, and let’s make potty training easier for you and your child!

Many parents worry that sleep training means choosing between their own needs and their child’s. They fear their child will feel abandoned, anxious, or even traumatized. But the truth is, sleep training—when done with love and consistency—can actually strengthen your bond with your child while giving you both the rest you need.

A Parent’s Journey: From Guilt to Confidence

When Jen first started sleep training her daughter, Ruth, she struggled with intense guilt. Every night, she would lie down with Ruth until she fell asleep. Then, she’d carefully sneak out to get a few things done before Ruth inevitably woke up, needing her presence again. Most nights, Jen ended up sleeping beside her daughter just to keep the peace, sacrificing both her rest and her evening downtime.

She worried that by changing their bedtime routine, she was somehow failing Ruth—that she would feel abandoned or unsafe. But as we worked together, Jen realized that what her daughter really needed wasn’t constant presence, but clear, loving boundaries that helped her feel secure.

The Power of Boundaries at Bedtime

By holding firm yet compassionate boundaries and gradually withdrawing her presence, Jen saw an incredible shift—not just in Ruth’s sleep, but in their entire relationship.

✅ Ruth became more confident and secure. Knowing her parents were in charge and that bedtime followed a predictable pattern actually reduced her anxiety.

✅ She was happier during the day. With better quality sleep, Ruth was noticeably more cheerful, patient, and resilient.

✅ Jen felt like a better parent. She finally had time in the evening to relax with her husband and get restful sleep in her own bed, making her more present and engaged during the day.

Why Sleep Training is a Gift to Your Child

Sleep training isn’t about abandoning your child—it’s about teaching them a skill that benefits their emotional well-being. When children know what to expect at bedtime and trust that their parents will be consistent, they feel safer. They also get the deep, restorative sleep they need for healthy emotional regulation, cognitive development, and overall happiness.

Many parents believe that setting sleep boundaries means prioritizing themselves over their child. But in reality, it’s a win-win. Well-rested parents are more patient, loving, and available, while well-rested children are happier, more secure, and better able to handle challenges during the day.

Sleep Training Lessons Apply to Parenting Beyond Bedtime

One of the biggest takeaways from sleep training is how valuable clear, loving boundaries are in parenting as a whole. When children understand that their parents set expectations and follow through with consistency, it leads to fewer power struggles and more connection throughout the day.

If you’re ready for more ease and joy in your relationship with your child, schedule a free consult for sleep coaching. And if you’ve already sleep trained but are still facing power struggles, parent coaching can help you apply these same boundary-setting principles to other areas of your child’s life.

Let’s work together to create a well-rested, happy home for both you and your child.