I Spent Two Weeks Agonizing Over A One Sentence Email

For two weeks, I agonized over asking one simple question. It sounds ridiculous.

My doctor recommended we meet to discuss starting a new medication. 

The thing was... we just met last month.

Did she remember that we'd just met and still think another appointment was necessary?

Or had she simply forgotten?

The situation was further complicated by us being friends. But not quite close enough to ask point blank what she really thought. 

I didn't want to imply that she was being unprofessional by recommending a second appointment.

But I also didn't want to dedicate the time, never mind the money, to an appointment that maybe wasn't necessary.

Then another thought crept in.

If I asked whether we really needed another visit, or if she could just send in the prescription, was I taking advantage of our friendship?

Around and around I went.

For two weeks.

Finally, I sent the email.

I asked whether we really needed another appointment or if this was something she
could simply tell me.

Her response?

"We don't need a visit. I can just tell you what to go buy."

That was it.

Two weeks of mental energy, dissolved by a one-sentence reply

As I reflected on it later, I realized something.

I wasn't afraid of asking a question.

I was afraid of risking the relationship. 

I was worried she might think I was questioning her judgment.

Or asking for free medical advice.

Or taking advantage of our friendship.

And that I'd lose the friendship.
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This is one of the sneakiest forms of people-pleasing.

Not saying yes when we want to say no.

But not ever asking for something because we're afraid of what someone else might think.

It feels safer to pay for an appointment we may not need than to risk someone misunderstanding our intentions.

I've gotten much better at catching myself when I start spiraling like this, even though it still happens. I'd love to help you do the same. 

​Imagine what you could do with all the energy you currently spend trying to prevent other people from misunderstanding you. 

And if you're one of my sleep coaching grads, you already know what it's feels like to get your evenings back. I'd love to help you reclaim your mental energy too.
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Let's talk. There's no commitment, no cost, and no pressure.